Hello there.

I walked away from this blog for reasons I don't really know. I got busy with life, school, moving, and I didn't feel as if I had a real focus as to where I wanted to go with this. What I really wanted to write about, or the things I really wanted to share pretty much just jumbled up in my head. I put it on the back burner because while I feel passionate about fat fashion and fat acceptance, I couldn't quite find what it is I wanted to say. I couldn't find my voice.

I spent some time thinking about what it is that makes me mad and what makes me happy. Along the way I realize that I really am a work still in progress, and I always will be. Fat acceptance for me has been a blessing and it has been depressing. In the past 3 years I have been able to look in the mirror and say "I am fat, this is who I am" and ok with it. More than ok, in the last year to be more exact. Other peoples words have less of an effect on me today than they did 5 years ago. 5 years ago I would cry and ask myself why I let myself get this way. Why can't I stay focused on a restricted diet. I would beat myself up and tell myself that nobody would or could love the fat girl. There was something wrong with me.

The truth of the matter is, and I see this now, there is nothing wrong with ME. There is something wrong with the person that thinks fat people are void of feelings. There is something wrong with the person that feels like they are better than a fat person. There is something wrong that people spread fat hate like it is a disease. When I really thought about it, what really makes me angry is the anti fat crowd. The people that think there is something wrong with you BECAUSE you are fat, and that you should aspire to be thin. You should diet, you should exercise, and you should be striving to be the smallest you can be. Because if you aren't small, you aren't worthy of all the good things life has in store for you.

You can be fat and healthy, and I will say that until I die. Fat people can and do eat well, and fat people can and do exercise. Fat does not = fast food for dinner 5 nights a week. Fat does not mean you are gorging yourself on fat foods every single damn day. And being fat doesn't mean you deserve to be the butt of a joke, and you should never be made to feel like you would be ok if you changed.

I realize that I feel sad and overwhelmed that there are people out there that do not get what I am saying. It is a bit depressing to me. I think of how I was before I was ok with myself, and I wonder how many people out there still think there is something wrong with them. How many people are subject to ridicule because anti fat people are so mean. I think that is who I write for. My goal for this blog is to one day, just change one persons mind. Whether is a fat person finally accepting their body, or an anti fat person finally seeing that we are not lazy slobs. I don't care if it takes 1 week or 50 years.